Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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