omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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