Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it's like iHOP with fire
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
