I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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