office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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