what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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