Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
