please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
