so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
smell my finger.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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