Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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