I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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