just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
