I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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