I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize