Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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