make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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