I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize