Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I smell stomach acid.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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