Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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