just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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