I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
