Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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