I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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