Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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