genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
