I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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