Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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