She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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