"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize