i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize
