I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize