whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Randomize
