oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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