do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
