What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
