Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
