Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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