PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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