Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize