this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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