just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
