VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
