i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
we're making bets on your personal life
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
