She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
