Just mADE A PArabola og urine
you would pick up someone in the library
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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