when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
