She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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