Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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