i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
