You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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